question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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