last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
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Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
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They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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