you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
