Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
i think im in europe. pls send help
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize