My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
