i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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