I wannas sexs uuuuu
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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