pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
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