Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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