I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
