I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
