Porn is love you can see.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize