He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
