For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize