I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
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The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
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You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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