Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You are the jesus of drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize