I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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