i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
