I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
