you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
