guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
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Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
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There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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