Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
What a dumb baby whore.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
