That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
