i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
it was like eating out sand paper
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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