She is in my trunk
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
