it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
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