im having a threesome with these popsicles
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize