No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
