I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
