I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
