It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize