Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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