two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR