This girl is more easily done than said...
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Bring me that man meat
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize