bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
