and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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