Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
