I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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