But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
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Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
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Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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