ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
