Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize