Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
