Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
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