Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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