ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
