Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
