So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize