the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
