I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
