that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is